ALFAVE: The Practice That Helped Me Rise Again

Me and meditation? Bad relationship.
We just didn’t click.

I tried the apps.
Tried the gurus on YouTube.
Dropped $500 on a fancy gadget, which I threw away after two weeks.
Even went to a temple in Thailand, and sat with monks.

Peace never came.
And the voice in my head wouldn’t shut up.

“Goodbye, Meditation,” I said.
“You’re not for me.”

And we ghosted each other. For two years.

A few months ago, when I made a silent promise to myself that I’d end the darkest chapter of my life, I thought about meditation again.

But this time, I didn’t go searching for another method.
I asked:

What if I created my own?
What if I took pieces from here and there — the ones my brain actually applauded — even if it didn’t look like traditional meditation?

That’s how ALFAVE was born.

I tried it. Just to see.

One week in — I smiled.
Like, a real smile — not the fake “I’m fine” type.

Week two —  I smiled bigger.
Week three — my soul joined in.
Week four… we laughed together. Me and my soul.

Something inside me was healing.
Quietly. Consistently.

Finally — I’d found it. Or built it!

A meditation… A method… A practice… One that actually worked for me.

And the results?
They started jumping out of my heart, begging to be shared.

I wanted to wait 365 days before doing it.

But then the Universe tapped me on the shoulder…

I Swear, I Haven’t Taken Anything
“Whaaaaat have you been doing, Avo???”
He asked while pressing into my spine, sounding personally offended, like my muscles had been hiding something from him.

Panic mode: ON.

I hadn’t seen my manual therapist in three months.
Didn’t stretch. Didn’t swim. Didn’t do a single assignment.
I started mumbling an apology…

“Uhh… Yeah, sorry…But I’ll start…”

He cut me off.

“No, no. I mean it in a good way. Your body looks different. Younger. The energy... You look 18.”

The funny thing?
He wasn’t the first to say it.

Earlier that same day, I saw three friends — separately. 

None of them knew what I’d been through just months ago.
How dark it had gotten.

But all of them gave me that suspicious look.

“What have you been on, bro?”
“Some kind of magic pills?”
“Did you find a guru on a mountain or what?”

Okay, Universe… Let’s go!
This is the day when the Universe tapped me on the shoulder and said,
“It’s time.”

Okay.

It’s been 113 days since I started this thing.
My method. My practice. My experiment.

One session in the morning. One in the evening.

This isn’t the only experiment I’ve been running.
But this? This one is the champion. 

It gets most of the credit.
For helping me heal, clearing my energy, and not just bringing back my smile…
But making it bigger than ever. On my face. In my soul. In my heart.

It’s not a traditional meditation.
I stole a few ideas, broke some rules, added my own flavor.

And BAM! It worked.

ALFAVE.
6 letters. 6 stages.

I just take a few deep breaths…
And begin with A.

A - APPRECIATION
It’s scary how easy it is to forget.
To take things for granted.
To obsess over what’s missing,
Instead of cherishing what’s already here.

So I start with gratitude. With thank you!

Not just saying it. But feeling it. Appreciating.

For everything I have. For everyone I have.
For my legs and hands, my eyes and lungs,
For my wife and friends, for my peace and freedom — for this gift called LIFE.

L - LOVE
Next, I go to my heart.
To the people — and beings — I love.

My wife.
Yakko, my parrot.
Batman, my cat.
Family members. Friends. Teammates. Students.

I picture their bright faces. Their smiles. Their laughter.
I hold them close — one by one — with a silent hug.

F - FORGIVENESS
This part isn’t fun.
But it’s necessary.

I scan for tension.
I go through any negative charges I’ve been carrying.

That driver who cut me off and almost hit my car.
The teammate I disagreed with yesterday.
A stranger who said something rude.
Anyone who left a mark, even a small one.

One by one, I forgive them.
Because most of the time, when people hurt others, they carry their own pain.

That doesn’t excuse it, but it helps me let go without hate.

Not because they need it.
Because I do. 

Not to be nice.
But to release the weight I’m carrying.

And if I feel I was wrong?
I message them right after I finish ALFAVE.

No ego. No delay.
Just cleaning the mess.
Inside and out.

A - ADJUSTMENT
This is my mindset shift.
Whatever’s worrying me — whatever I don’t like — I imagine it. I face it.

And then I add one word: But.

“I’m so overwhelmed with the number of decisions I must make today.”

But…

This means I’m in control!

I don’t have to deal with a cofounder who wants to sell the company.

I don’t have a VC pressuring me to scale fast in unethical ways.

I get to choose how we grow.

I get to lead ChessMood in the direction I dream about, while staying true to our values.

That one word — But — changes everything.

It helps me adjust the lens.
Not to lie.
But to focus on the bright side.

Because there's always one.

V - VISION
Whenever I forget where I want to go, life puts me on autopilot.
And the river starts carrying me somewhere I never meant to be.

I start reacting instead of creating.
And I miss opportunities — not because they weren’t there, but because I didn’t see them.

So at this stage, I stop.
And I remember. And imagine.

In detail — the life I want to create.

I see my family.
My wife, our dog, cat, and Yakko — all playing in the garden.
Laughter. Sunlight. Peace.

I see our teammates.
The ones who helped build ChessMood brick by brick — and how together, we’re serving millions.

I see our students. Our community.
Meetups in every corner of the world — stories, fun, love.

I see it all.

I hold gratitude in one hand, and vision in the other.

I cherish where I am — and still, I look ahead.

Because if I don’t, I might drift somewhere I never meant to go.

E - EXECUTION
Then I zoom into today.
Switch from vision to motion.

I ask:
How would my best self show up today?

What would he focus on?
What would he let go of?
How would he recover, reset, protect his energy?
What would he do that his future self would thank him for?

After asking, and answering, I open my eyes and go do it.
Not always perfectly, but I go.

Because the future doesn’t build itself.

Take What You Need
I followed what the Universe told me and shared my method.
My ALFAVE.

The practice that pulled me out of the darkest chapter of my life —
and helped me rise, rebuild, and return with more light than ever.

But this?
This doesn’t have to be your ALFAVE.

You can start with my version — and then shape it into your own.

Steal what you need.
Remove a stage.
Add your own.
Make it yours.

Maybe you only need three letters.
Maybe you’ll turn it into something new — your own rhythm, your own ritual.

There’s no perfect version.
There’s only the one that works — for you.

And once you find it, test it, and start hearing strange questions from your doctor and friends...

The Hidden Connection
Does this have anything to do with improving your chess and your journey?

At first glance?
Maybe nothing.

But actually… everything.

Just imagine:
You go through your journey with gratitude.
With love in your heart.
With a clear vision.
And focused execution.

Now imagine the opposite:
No peace.
No clarity.
No direction.

How many opportunities will you see in that state?
And how many will slip by — without you even knowing they were there?

That’s why this matters.
Not just for life.
But for your chess journey, too.

With best wishes and love,
For your growth and fun journey,
GM Avetik (or Avo, as my friends call me)

THANK YOU
Dear friend, please accept my gratitude — for reading this, and for trusting me with your time.

My thanks also go to the people — and their work —who inspired me to build ALFAVE.

I don’t remember all the names, or exactly which idea I stole from where…
but here are a few I do remember:

Hermann Hesse, thank you for Siddhartha.
L-LOVE is from you! 

Jay Shetty, thank you for Think Like a Monk.
I couldn’t forgive people. I started with your method.

Vishen Lakhiani, thank you for The Code of the Extraordinary Mind.
Your 6-phase meditation was the biggest inspiration for ALFAVE.
Some parts didn’t work for me — so I adjusted them, added my own, and created this method. Just like I recommend others to do.

And thank you for the Mindvalley you’ve created.
It shapes my life too.