Chess game rules are ridiculous lmao

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LeoLOL87

The people who made Chess game rules were probably on crack when they made them...

1. Pawns can move up two squares or one square at the start...like make up your mind how many squares pawns can move up and then the pawns can only move up one square after???  Bro, you are a joke!

2. You totally made up this stupid pawn rule and then called it, "en passant" like Starbucks called their cup sizes Tall, Grande, Venti, Trenta as if I am going to be impressed and forget that it’s dumb?

3. A pawn gets "promoted" to any material except another King (nice logic there) and can’t remain a pawn (what if the pawn is happy and content as being a pawn? do you ever think about that?) when reaching the end of board as if there is a Genie waiting there to grant a wish to the pawn just for making it to the end???  Really, bro?

4. The King can only move in any direction for one square except "castling," omg lol, are you for real???  When did the King learn how to teleport and swap with the rook?! That’s two moves!

5. Why do the knights move in two different L shapes like they are complete losers? ROFL. 

At least Checkers have consistent rules…😂😂😂

Over and out, bishes!!!

BoardMonkey

1. In Makruk the pawns start on the third rank. Just a curious thing.

2. Back then French was a prestigious language.

3. Upward mobility. Not enough of it in the world.

4. King moves the same in Janggi, Xiangqi, Shogi, Shatranj, Makruk and others. You have to build your castles by slowly moving your pieces into formation in the other games.

5. Just a fact of geometry.

You're right. It's hard to make sense of rules elaborated over centuries of time.

LeoLOL87
BoardMonkey wrote:

1. In Makruk the pawns start on the third rank. Just a curious thing.

2. Back then French was a prestigious language.

3. Upward mobility. Not enough of it in the world.

4. King moves the same in Jaangi, Xiangqi, Shogi, Shatranj, Makruk and others. You have to build your castles by slowly moving your pieces into formation in the other games.

5. Just a fact of geometry.

You're right. It's hard to make sense of rules elaborated over centuries of time.

Don't show this to MAGA clowns on this site.  😂

BoardMonkey
LeoLOL87 wrote:
BoardMonkey wrote:

3. Upward mobility. Not enough of it in the world.

 

Don't show this to MAGA clowns on this site.  😂

Actually, the 2,600 MAGA counties in the country only have 30% of the nation's wealth. The 500 Democrat counties have 70% of the wealth. I do get your point about objecting to their methods though. We better quit now.

Duck

Looks like someone lost a game because they didn't know what en passant was

LeoLOL87
ScatteredWealth wrote:

Looks like someone lost a game because they didn't know what en passant was

Lol, no.  A guinea pig like you wouldn't understand...😂

LeoLOL87
frog wrote:

bro is calling other people guinea pigs while complaining about rules of a board game 💀💀💀

Bruh, he's from Guinea and guinea pig...

LeoLOL87
frog wrote:

wait so if I change flag to chad am I a chad

If a play on words is too much for your 2 functioning brain cells, let me know.

BlueHen86
ScatteredWealth wrote:

Looks like someone lost a game because they didn't know what en passant was

Thought the same thing, but then I realized he's not serious. Just trolling for fun.

BlueHen86
frog wrote:

wait so if I change flag to chad am I a chad

Change it to Jamaica, everybody likes Jamaica.

LeoLOL87
BlueHen86 wrote:
ScatteredWealth wrote:

Looks like someone lost a game because they didn't know what en passant was

Thought the same thing, but then I realized he's not serious. Just trolling for fun.

It's way too big brained for some people here.  Thanks for getting it.  

BlueHen86
LeoLOL87 wrote:
BlueHen86 wrote:
ScatteredWealth wrote:

Looks like someone lost a game because they didn't know what en passant was

Thought the same thing, but then I realized he's not serious. Just trolling for fun.

It's way too big brained for some people here.  Thanks for getting it.  

 I appreciate the humor.

LeoLOL87
BlueHen86 wrote:
LeoLOL87 wrote:
BlueHen86 wrote:
ScatteredWealth wrote:

Looks like someone lost a game because they didn't know what en passant was

Thought the same thing, but then I realized he's not serious. Just trolling for fun.

It's way too big brained for some people here.  Thanks for getting it.  

 I appreciate the humor.

That's what I was trying to do...most people post generic crap on these forums and I am trying to change that.  It became too much for some, lmao.

blueemu

There's a chess variant called Bombalot, in which the Queen is a Bomb instead. If the opponent can tag it with a Knight, it detonates... wiping out everything, friend and foe, within two squares.

BlueHen86
frog wrote:

hard to tell what is satire on this site 💀

It's all satire, it's just that the author isn't always in on it.