Wow, I feel like we're all so demanding...but at any rate, perhaps we could have a side note on the seeks or the tournaments stating "fast game pls" or "very casual".
I know that we can currently adjust our seeks for how fast the other player tends to play and that seems to serve me well when I use it.
You can currently use the game's name for this purpose.
Yes, it has happened to me and it's annoying, but I just ignore. If they don't want to play they can just resign! It seems life is at such a fast pace that there are those that think chess has to be also. I was playing a long game with someone and he typed in that I was making my moves too slow, so he resigned. I don't understand it, isn't a long game supposed to be long??? Anyway, he shouldn't have been challenging a long game if he wanted the moves to be quick...go figure!
disable chat - move at your own pace - play any way you want - enjoy your games 
if he wishes to foolishly go faster then it is his stupid fault
Dont listen 2 him
If the request was disrespectful, just remind to your opponent that the time limit was agreed upon by playing the game.
And if the opponent continues bashing you, just ask her/him to resign.
Haha, I LOL'd.
some people start playing as slowly as they can out of sheer spite. Make your excuses.
Regarding the polite request, is it still polite to ask at the beginning of the game, with the intention of aborting if the player does not agree to the terms?
yes of course, you,ve/told warned them.
That's nice of you. Do you lock people's brakes up when they tailgate you as well?
I don't lock up my brakes for tailgaters, but I do slow down for them. I get very interesting results. And if someone complains about how slow I play chess then I lock up my brakes.
You've agreed to a time limit and stuck with that. What I do find annoying is joining a tournament and after a few weeks everyones games are finished apart from with one player that holds everything up... the N moves in X days sounds quite an appealing feature for tournaments.
I have never experienced this...but I am sure someone making such a request after the game has started (in your case very rudely) probably did not take the time to read "the fine print"...this is usual for immature players (regardless of their age).
You've agreed to a time limit and stuck with that. What I do find annoying is joining a tournament and after a few weeks everyones games are finished apart from with one player that holds everything up... the N moves in X days sounds quite an appealing feature for tournaments.
There is definitely a need for additional time controls -- especially with the challenge of managing around no-vacation (or capped vacation, which would also be a good addition) tournaments when you have little certainty over how long a round might last. There's a detailed discussion about some of the possibilities here:
http://www.chess.com/forum/view/general/discussion-of-different-time-limits-for-online-games
Might have to look at there! I think tournaments need to be looked at as there have been a few where one or two games (which could not make a difference to the overall result) has put back the next round by a month or so
Regarding the polite request, is it still polite to ask at the beginning of the game, with the intention of aborting if the player does not agree to the terms?