question: how do I beat aggressive players?

I'm very new. But half of the time I get a player who gets out their queen in 5 moves. Then I just dance around trying to punish them for it, but instead they kill all my pieces and I loose. How to I punish them for being agro?

Trying to immediately punish bad opening moves is a typical mistake. Of course if you can win a free pawn or piece then do that, but typically punishment doesn't come until the middlegame (around move 10 or 15) and it happens because you have superior development.

In case you've never heard of "opening development"
https://www.chess.com/article/view/the-principles-of-the-opening

So for example:

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Notice white is basically ignoring black, preferring to develop quickly. After there are no more knights or bishops on the back rank, and white has castled, white plays a pawn break in the center, and tactics "magically" appear (white eventually forks black's queen on g7 pawn, which lets white win the rook in the corner).

The moves I show aren't all engine moves, but it shows the general form of what a game looks like when it's a strong player vs someone falling behind in development.

Sometimes your opponent makes more threats than that so I'll give another example. Always check what your opponent's last move threatened. Look for all the ways you can defend it, and then choose the way that helps you have a speedy development.

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So again, notice the general flow of the game. Bring out knights and bishops quickly, castle, and then play a pawn break in the center (pawn break meaning use a pawn to attack an enemy pawn that's blocked). Pawn breaks open up the position so that you can make use of your superior development.

Thanks for the feedback! I don't know much about openings so I'll check out the article. I'll try developing more whilst my enemy is aggressive, hopefully it works like this:

enemy: aggressive, bad development

me: defensive, good development

enemy: tries to attack

me: punishes or makes them flee?

Yeah.

There's an old Alekhine quote about how a chessmaster should be a combination of a monk and a beast of prey.

Of course there's nothing wrong with quickly winning pieces or chasing your opponent around, sometimes that happens, but in general the first 10 moves are more monk-like. You simply focus on your own development, the beast part coming afterwards

Man I love bishops. They sit in wait like patient archers waiting to strike. That was a nice fork in the first example.

I used to HATE when people opened with the wayward queen.  I actually had blocked players who opened that way.

Then I watched some videos and learned to defeat it.  Now I get excited to see that move because I can win 8 of 10 time.  I think it is generally a mistake to bring out a queen too early (from what I have read and been told)

Off topic, but @Gserper wrote an article about the Wayward Queen Attack, in which he mentioned that a GM whose name I forget called it indecent, and that it is disrespectful to your opponent to play it.

You beat them by terrorizing em. You make them wish they didn't be so stupid

You beat aggressive players by thinking carefully and organising an efficient defence.
Here is a famous example.
https://www.chessgames.com/perl/chessgame?gid=1095025 
The gambit 8...d5 was a novelty, that Marshall had studied secretly for years. Capablanca has never seen this before, he accepts the pawn, defends, and wins.

Either by being aggressive yourself or passive to counter his aggression. 

A guess. Does you game look like This...?

If so, the answer is this:

That's it! Just don't play e5. play c5. It's called 'Sicilian', and is played by world-champions, it's very fun - you attack White!

But, if you really like e5, then:

The Sicilian Defense is very positional and requires intense memorization, more so than e4 e5 Qh5.

if you can't beat 'em, join 'em.  👊

You have to use tactics to beat your opponent. Being too aggressive opens up a bunch of possibilities to exploit your opponent.

Hi! My name is Lauren Goodkind and I’m a respected  chess coach and chess YouTuber who helps beginners out : 

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCP5SPSG_sWSYPjqJYMNwL_Q

Here’s some ideas to help you beat aggressive players.    

-Consider all checks and captures on your side and also your opponent’s side. Always as, “If I move here, where is my opponent going to move?”. Do this for every single move, 100% of the time!  Look at all the pieces on the board!    

-Play with a slow time control, such as G/30 so you have plenty of time to think before every move. 

I hope that this helps.  

Many aggressive players rush out and try to attack your kingside but remember they won't castle or castle at opposite side so only way is too counter play 

idk maybe be solid don't blunder anything and wait for them to slowly break up