the best attack with the strongest move

a game where I forced the win against a higher rated opponent , playing an opening I don't know

the reason i would like others to see this game is because at a certain moment I worked myself into a position where I heavily attack my opponent.

 ones in such a position I often don't know what to do.

It is actually a fear of missing out the best move.

If would appreciate if someone can tell me what he would do in my position

Probably start with h4. If he takes, Qxh2#. If not, open the h-file by taking on g3. Then you've gotta have something.

21. ... Qd7. Is there any defense to Qd7-h3-g2#?

if I would play h4 , he would probably play Rh1 , and then I would loose the h-file and he would streghten his defence

yeah I missed that one

17. ... h4 looks good to me. If black plays 18. Rh1 then you just let the rook sit stupidly behind the h-pawn where it does nothing at all. You play something like 18. ... Ne5 aiming at f3 and continue to bring your forces in. You have time to play Bf5 or Bg4 and then 0-0-0 when your other rook participates. White has nothing to do because his rook is stuck on h1 defending your threats. The threat of hxg3 is powerful.

Well then you could just play h3 instead if you were worried. There'd be a sac in there something like the one you did; probably one of the knights.

tnx for your time Loomis,

my problem is that being in an attacking position often makes me nervous and scared of being outdefended.

especially against higher rated players (at move 17 I had a rating of about 1450) 

I can't follow , 

can you please clarify?

tnx for your time -waller-

Well I think Loomis explained it well enough. Rh1 isnt a threat for Black becaues he's never going to open the h-file for himself. You have the option of playing h3 or hxg3 as the situation dictates, plus time enough to get your bishop and other rook into play. I liked your sacrifice at the end of the game by the way :-)