Opponent Tells Me To Go Kill Myself After He Wins

This is not a call-out post. I have already reported the user and moved on. I doubt anything will happen to him though, as he is still online and playing.

What I want to discuss is the general response and reaction that I get from my opponent.- More specifically, towards resignation.

For context, we were playing a bullet game where I blundered a couple pieces too many, which lead to him trading down easily to a king-queen-rook vs king ladder mate. I was down on time, but I played on. Why? Because it's bullet. anything can happen. - It was honestly a good game on his part. He played well and I asked for a rematch. However, as declining; he was prompt to hop into the chat and point attention to the time and material difference. I said whatever. To which he told me to "go die", "seriously, go kill yourself".

Obviously, his reaction to my play is out-warranted; you shouldn't say something like that over a petty game of chess; but I've seen this same sentiment before on another chess site.- Same scenario - however, my opponent was much more compassionate and expressed his view on the ordeal:

"I mean, you should never resign, unless it’s 100% lost position. And you better not waste our time and resign. i'm not gonna stalemate you in that position but you keep playing. It's annoying. It’s a very good habit to not resign but there are always exceptions. To resign a game is to acknowledge that your opponent has reached a position so strong that only through gross mistakes would he/she lose. It is also a mark of respect because it assumes your opponent will not in fact make such mistakes. It is rude and unsportsmanlike to abandon a lost position without resigning so as to allow your clock to run out of time. It is generally considered proper chess etiquette to resign clearly lost positions. The proper time to resign should vary with one's chess ability."

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I want to challenge this mindset and make my stance very clear. - Resigning is not, and should not be a declaration of sportsman etiquette. - It should be an avenue that a player accepts as opposed to playing on in a lost game.- it is not for the winner to have a decisive victory, but rather; for the loser to have a quick death. That's it.

If my opponent is playing a king-queen-knight vs king endgame, and hangs their queen unintentionally- It should not be my fault for their mistake, just as I should not be blamed if my opponent blunders a piece on move 6 of an opening. Whatever happens, happens; and you should be held responsible for your actions, thoughts, and desires.

There is no etiquette in saving my opponent's face, if my opponent doesn't need the saving.

As for wasting my opponent's time? They should know from the start of the game that the objective is to checkmate. They should account for the time controls set in place and use it to their advantage.- not to see it as an obstacle from reaching the next game, but a confinement for the parameters of the current game. - If you can't sit through 2 minutes of a chess game; winning or losing; you shouldn't put yourself through it. - I get it, the stress can get to you; but overcoming the pressures to perform is an essential part of the game.

I'm not gonna break the speed limit to make the guy tailgating behind me happy. I am not gonna outright lose a chess game without a fight by resigning. I will play to the very best of my ability; and trust that you do the same.

I'll bet any money that it's a pre-pubescent boy.

Kind of rude to assume that

yeah not really

Dayum, I would also tell him to do the same to himself.

I agree 100% with the sentiment. Wild that people think they have earned the "respect" of a resignation and get wound up about it. I have won or drawn far too many lost games to start assuming that my opponents will be able to convert or mate successfully. I've seen games which end that way at the 2200+ level, too. These people are deliberately mischaracterising appropriate scepticism as disrespect precisely because they're mad that you're not making their life easier for them, like you owe it to them- they're just egotistical bullies.

I've had extremely rude people DM me harassing messages about not resigning or declining a rematch, and all I can say is that I can't picture those people going far in chess with that little respect for boundaries. I've also had some YUM YUM YUM DELICIOUS games where opponents were calling me names and demanding a resignation, sent me a "GG" and told me my position was hopeless, or underpromoted to mess me around, and I've gone on to draw or win. The shame of even the thought that happening to me is a large part of the reason why I'll never send a message like that lol. Pride comes before a fall and all that.

I would actually be more happy if my opponent is trying, since I get to learn more and it would be more fun to play against. People who resign early is alright too, but seriously, it's worth trying as miracles do actually happen.

I didn't assume anything. I said that I'd bet money on it. I'm am perfectly willing to accept that it's not, but it's a simple matter of probabilities. If you've ever played an online game with voice chat, it's almost always the squeakers that say the rudest things about sleeping with your mother or wishing death upon you. They often tend not to have filters or sense, and enjoy asserting their squeaky dominance. Of course it *could* be an adult, but I doubt it unless they are a real sociopath.