The effect of chess on relationships

I like psychology so Iam drawn to this question. How does your chess effect the people around you? I'm clearly an amateur player so don't spend a lot of time studying. However I want to study more as I want to improve my game. I get the feeling that some non chess playing people think sometimes that Iam wasting my time. My girlfriends mother for instance is into card games , word games and other intellectual pastimes. As soon as I mention anything to do with chess her eyes glaze over she huffs and turns away to show her disinterest. I also wonder how many of my fellow chess enthusiasts on Chess.com have had issues regarding the time you spend with chess? Who would end a relationship than end playing chess?

With anything, you need balance and communication. If your partner or family is unhappy with your time use with chess, whatever the about, then a discussion can be had and possibly a resolution. If my wife ever demanded I quit chess or she'd leave me, which would never happen, I'd definitely out chess. It's a game after all. But most people are quite reasonable and usually a compromise can be reached if it was ever an issue to your partner.

Your mother-in-law would act the same whatever your interest was, they are put on this world to annoy us.

Luckily reading English is not her strong point.  :S

"...Compromise..." nice idea. Covertly timing their hours spent watching soaps and Facebook browsing and turning that into chess time would be a good start or end. As for the "...mother in law..." I guess it was light hearted however it's chess she only reacts too in this way. Don't understand it really.

Who knows, some non chess players idealize this game a bit, like it was something special, maybe her attitude is like sour grapes since she is into other games.

My experience in trying to introduce chess to a girl who doesn't already play is, well, depressing to say the least. :)

Almost no one ever tells me I'm wasting my time studying chess, witch is kind of funny because obviously it's a complete wast of time, other than I enjoy it. I have had relationship problems over chess. Kind of ridiculous since almost everyone is constantly on their phone anyways, god forbid I'm playing chess instead of checking my facebook. Some people just don't enjoy the game and who am I to judge? I wouldn't try to paint a picture just because someone I was dating liked art. It seems perfectly fine that couples don't share every hobby.

My child was created in a blitz chess match with my wife.

She was a WFM from Russia and I was at that point unrated but PRETTY DAMN strong. 

She told me "If you win, Ill do whatever you want me to do".

MY RATING INCREASED BY 500 POINTS and well... THINGS HAPPENED.

when you mention chess to a friend, do you really expect their face to light up with joy ?

it takes ages to learn the game and for what ?

Hey you have great rating for amateur.

 

Thanks FM StevanJovic for the confidence boost. : )

I am a games player through and through.  Played every card game there is from the earliest age, competitive bridge by the age of 14, chess from about eight, poker at University, war games, computer games, you name it.

No gf or wife has ever understood or liked this.  But you must be yourself.  Notoriously, women seek to change you.  It seems to be in their nature.  But I find it hard to believe that if they succeeded in changing me - the guy they chose - it would turn out well.  So I am up for compromise but not up for wholesale change.

My present gf is very into browser games.  I wonder if it will be different this time round?