Warning! Chess Causes Alcoholism!

"Alcoholism, the only productive activity in a capitalist society."

Sergei Rubinistov

According to E.I.C.H.A almost 30% of all chess players are alcoholics.  At first, I thought this statistic mad, (no pun intended against MADD - mothers against drunk drivers) until I read why this is so.  In chess, there is no talking and so players must repress their desire for social interaction.  Because most have such anemic personalities to begin with, this mandatory silence is quite imposing which is why incidentally, so many of these emotional cripples have flooded to the online world of chess.  Chess itself has numerous rules already of which the slightest infraction can get you booted from tournament play or excoriated at club level.  In addition, chess is the ultimate sedentary sport where all you do is sit in silence.  If you look at societies with sparse populations, you will also notice high levels of alcoholism.  Another thing E.I.C.H.A discovered is that half of all household fires were caused by alcoholics and a high percentage of these fires started were caused by chess players while intoxicated according to police records.  Another factor mentioned was that chess itself is an anti-economical way to spend time.  You are not networking, learning a new skill, working, or spending time with your family, so when a player does get home, his home life is in frequent disaray leading to more dependence on alcohol.  Finally, genetics plays a major part.  Many alcoholic parents have unwisely taught their children how to play chess, but also how to consume intoxicating spirits.  It is not without shame that these parents set themselves up for failure by inducing their young to model an inebriated adult chess player.     

The one thing I have learned about Chess.com is that nobody on this site helps anybody.  That is why I am hoping to start an Enlightened Congress of joy, hope, spiritual nourishing and a little chess in moderation.

HHH Advisors

I can't tell if this is a joke, but I think it is.  It is a joke, right?

I'll drink to that!

Actually, I think it may be the other way around.  Maybe alcoholism causes involvement with chess as the player recognizes an "addictive behavior" less harmful than substance abuse and becomes a chessaholic instead.

What is E.I.C.H.A.?

Cheers!

 E.I.C.H.A. = Every Intoxicated Chessplayer Has Alcoholism.

Yes. This is the newest account of Haywood.

That would explain a lot.

Brother Haywood...er...I mean Mr. HHH...yes, I've been traveling too.

Now, where was I? Oh, yes...the evils of both drinking and chess. Cigars, too? Maybe even women? How about cursing?

Is this some kind of obscene, occult joke? Look here! If this is your idea of wholesomeness and Heaven, I'll have no part of it.

Who's Haywood (besides being a troll who's no longer around)?

Isn't E.I.C.H.A. the same as E.I.E.I.O.?

He is still around under the guise of the OP.

Whether the OP is the infamous Haywood or not:

DON'T FEED THE TROLL!

But we must feed our livestock. Haywood has been struggling with obesity so we have all pretty much put him on a crash diet though. He needs to learn a new trick to get a treat. The overweight, rich, middleaged, pompous act has been old for a while.

Speak for yourself.  After reading this I knew it was time for a drink, I'll remain composed though.  Cheers fellas.

Wikipedia ... causes of Alcoholism. Please note chess isn't one of them nor is Capitalism:

Causes

A complex mixture of genetic and environmental factors influences the risk of the development of alcoholism.^[78] Genes that influence the metabolism of alcohol also influence the risk of alcoholism, and may be indicated by a family history of alcoholism.^[79] One paper has found that alcohol use at an early age may influence the expression of genes which increase the risk of alcohol dependence.^[80] Individuals who have a genetic disposition to alcoholism are also more likely to begin drinking at an earlier age than average.^[81] Also, a younger age of onset of drinking is associated with an increased risk of the development of alcoholism,^[81] and about 40 percent of alcoholics will drink excessively by their late adolescence. It is not entirely clear whether this association is causal, and some researchers have been known to disagree with this view.^[82] A high testosterone concentration during pregnancy may be a risk factor for later development of alcohol dependence.^[83]

Severe childhood trauma is also associated with a general increase in the risk of drug dependency.^[78] Lack of peer and family support is associated with an increased risk of alcoholism developing.^[78] Genetics and adolescence are associated with an increased sensitivity to the neurotoxic effects of chronic alcohol abuse. Cortical degeneration due to the neurotoxic effects increases impulsive behaviour, which may contribute to the development, persistence and severity of alcohol use disorders. There is evidence that with abstinence, there is a reversal of at least some of the alcohol induced central nervous system damage.^[84]

You guys are being far too harsh on this fellow (I assume he is a male...never know on the worldwide intersect).

Wouldn't it be far kinder, more Christian-like, to give him the benefit of the doubts rather than the harsness of the finger?

You would cast stones and aspirsions (I don't know if I got that word quite right since English isn't my native tongue) on the tepid and the lamented? For shame.

The hippocracy.

You are an over stimulated intellectual that could use weed or booze to chill you out!

Hi Quarki!!